Stray Cat
by MySuperAwesomePenName
Summary: Kyoya comes home to a not so pleasant surprise.


Kyoya Ootori disliked cute things.

He did not hate them, but he did not like them either. He just disliked them. So he was, to put it best, annoyed when he came home after a long day at work to find a kitten lounging in his favorite chair.

He sighed, wishing his wife did not have such a sensitive heart. He and Haruhi had gotten married right out of high school; his father had wanted him to ask for her hand as soon as possible, a notion with which he agreed wholeheartedly. It had taken a while to convince Haruhi that he truly loved her, even with both him and Ranka trying.

He had been surprised that her father had actually agreed to let his daughter be wed, but Ranka had later reminded him that it looked like the only other competitors were Tamaki and Hikaru. He'd ranted on for a while about how 'that idiot', (aka, Tamaki), would not marry his daughter while he was still living, and that, while he loved Hikaru, Kyoya was obviously the better choice.

So they had both pushed her to make a decision, until finally she had declared that, fine, she would marry him, but only on the condition that they date first. So they had courted, married, and lived together happily for a few years.

That was, until she brought that _thing_ into their house.

* * *

><p>Haruhi Fujioka seldom felt sorry for things.<p>

She did not bat an eyelash when she saw the dead mouse in the mousetrap, could not bring herself to care for the baby possum some older couple had tried to get her to adopt ("He's just the sweetest thing, really." The woman smiled while the possum hissed and tried to chew through the protective gloves she was wearing).

Kittens, however, were entirely different.

She'd just gotten home from work and was unlocking the front door when she heard a pitiful mew. She found that the source of the sound was a kitten, huddled in the corner of the porch and shivering in the chilly weather.

She began to open the door, trying not to care that there was a starving kitten on her front porch, but stopped reluctantly at another meow. She sighed and turned back to look at the kitten. It was now tentatively making its way towards her. It meowed again, winding around her legs.

But she couldn't bring a stray kitten into their house, what would Kyoya say? _Your debt is being raised, Haruhi. Cats cost money._

But who was she kidding? She had paid off her debt years ago, she doubted her husband would come up with a new one, and besides, how much could cat food possibly cost?

The kitten was really very cute.

She picked it up, listening to it purr contentedly. That was it, she was keeping it.

She hurriedly went inside, closing the door behind her.

* * *

><p>Kyoya glared at the cat.<p>

"What is _that_, and where on _earth_ did it come from?"

Haruhi glanced up from the dinner she was making. "That is a kitten. I found him on the porch."

"Why did you bring him in?"

She gave him a look. "Do you see how skinny he is? I wasn't about to let him starve to death."

Kyoya gave an exasperated sigh. "He's sitting in my chair."

"If you want to sit there, just move him."

He advanced toward the thing, and went to grab him, only to have it hiss menacingly at him, and he decided that he wanted to keep his face, thank you very much.

Five minutes later, he was very angry. This was ridiculous. _He_ was the man of the house, and _that_ was just a rat covered in fur.

He made to grab him again, and again the thing hissed at him, just as Haruhi walked in from the other room.

"Kyoya," she scolded. "You scared him!"

"_I_ scared _him_?"

Haruhi picked up the kitten, which seemed to have no problems with her moving him, he thought bitterly, and walked back out of the room.

Kyoya turned back to his chair. Which he discovered was covered in cat hair. He sighed.

* * *

><p>That night was the worst of Kyoya' s life.<p>

Twice Haruhi got up during dinner to see if the cursed thing was still alive.

Later, Kyoya was still up, typing away, Haruhi having gone to bed way earlier. He got up and stretched his tired body, deciding to get some sleep. The kitten had disappeared into the bathroom, where Haruhi had put a litter box (God knows where she found that) about an hour ago, and he was glad not to have to deal with it. He did, however, need to use the bathroom.

He made his way to said bathroom, and upon entering, he froze in his tracks, horrified. There was toilet paper everywhere, like someone had put it through a shredder and then threw it into the air like confetti.

He gaped at the cat, who was calmly looking at him through narrowed eyes from his place in the sink.

Kyoya set to work cleaning the mess up, reminding himself several times that Haruhi would never speak to him again if he dropped the wretched thing off at the animal shelter.

The kitten watched him, smug.

Half an hour later, the mess had been cleaned up, and Kyoya was more exhausted than ever. All he wanted to do was climb into bed, wrap his arms around his wife, and sleep for several days. But just as he was crawling into bed, he heard the thing meowing. Deciding to ignore it, he reached for Haruhi.

And the meowing turned into a loud, yowling sound.

Immediately, Haruhi started to stir, and he panicked.

"Go back to sleep, Haruhi."

She turned over and did as he said, mumbling something.

He climbed wearily out of the bed, following the sound into the kitchen, where he found the little demon kitten pawing at the bowl Haruhi had put out for him. He wanted more food.

Sighing, Kyoya reluctantly searched the refrigerator, looking for something a cat would eat. He tried several meats, including tuna, chicken, and turkey, and several other foods like beets, macaroni, and rice, until the kitten decided he really _had_ wanted the tuna, which Kyoya angrily gave him. He stood there, waiting for the stupid thing to eat it.

The stupid thing did not eat it.

Kyoya childishly stomped back into the hallway, though admittedly, he was a bit quieter about it when he got closer to their bedroom.

The whole way there, the kitten stalked him.

It did not follow him, it _stalked_ him.

When he reached the bedroom, he climbed into the bed and went to reach for Haruhi.

The kitten had other ideas.

As soon as he moved his arms, the thing sprinted towards him. Startled, he watched as the thing jumped up onto the bed, squeezed under his arms, and curled up next to Haruhi, all in record time.

Kyoya tried to move the kitten, but it hissed warningly at him. Glaring at nothing, he turned over to face the wall.

The next morning he woke up to the thing, which was contentedly sprawled across his chest. Haruhi was sitting in the big easy chair in the corner of the room, an amused smile on her face.

"I guess he likes you." Kyoya sighed.

For such a little devil cat, the thing really was very cute.


End file.
